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Thanking your client for a referral vs client confidentiality

March 23, 2024

A male counsellor on the phone thanking a client for a referral

Your client refers a friend to your counselling practice. The friend actually rings you, tells you that ‘your client’ thought it would be a good idea to speak with you, and books a bunch of sessions. You would LOVE to thank your client for referring their friend. The question is, though: can you, ethically?

Opinions are divided on this one. Many counsellors say that confidentiality will be an issue here. They state that you cannot really disclose to your client that their friend has actually sought your support, as that breaches the friend’s right to confidentiality. The only way to really thank the client for their referral is to … thank them for the referral! And leave it at that. If they ask whether their friend has actually made contact, then you could say: you will have to ask your friend about that; I have to maintain confidentiality!

Another school of thought takes a slightly looser approach, and makes it dependent on the type of service. If it’s a more consulting/coaching type service, then potentially due to the “business-like” nature of the referral there is less need to maintain confidentiality to such a degree that not even a name can be mentioned. These practitioners argue that in the business world referrals happen so frequently, and are part of business practice, that thanking the client for the referral when the friend has actually made contact is not that detrimental to confidentiality.


Marc de Bruin is an ACA Level 4 counsellor, clinical supervisor (for both PACFA and ACA), university tutor, and former barrister-solicitor with over 20 years’ experience in counselling, supervision, and professional development. He is the founder of Counselling Supervision and Simplifying Life.

Article by Marc de Bruin

Marc is a Registered Counsellor, Supervisor (ACA Level 4) and University Tutor, with post-graduate training in MiCBT, ACT and EMDR. With a background in law and over two decades of experience in personal and professional development, he combines evidence-based counselling approaches with a transpersonal perspective in both his private practice and supervision sessions. Marc was trained in the RISE UP supervision model, developed by ACA's ex-CEO Philip Armstrong.

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